The first question most people ask about their skills is “what can I do?”
Let’s shift that to, “what do I want to keep doing?”
The gap between them is where a lot of mid-career transitions go sideways.
I’ve coached women with deep expertise in one area who are also profoundly tired of it. Women with fifteen years of project management experience who would rather never lead another project. Women whose strongest skill on paper is people management — something they’re good at, have always been good at, and dread doing for the rest of their careers.
Having a skill does not create an obligation to build your next chapter around it.
This is the Skills and Experience circle of the Power Position framework, and it’s the one I see people treat as a resume exercise. However, the Passion circle asks what you want. The Market Demand circle asks what the world will pay for it. The Skills circle has a version of both questions baked into it.
So here’s the sorting exercise. Two columns, not one:
Skills you do well and want to keep using
Skills you do well and want to stop using
Both columns matter, but the second one tells you things your resume can’t.
I know the counterargument. In this job market, you want to be versatile. Cast a wide net. Do whatever it takes to land the role. I get it. And sometimes a “for now” job is the right call.
But even then, the question isn’t only which skills you’re bringing in the door. It’s which ones you want to develop while you’re there. Because a “for now” job that keeps reinforcing the skills you’re sick of using isn’t a stepping stone. It’s a holding pattern with a new logo.
The deeper question sits underneath all of this: Are you willing to close the gap between where you are and where you want to go? In your current circumstances, with your constraints.
If the answer isn’t a clear yes, that’s not a dead end. It’s a redirect. The gap might need to be smaller, the timeline longer, or the direction slightly different. All three are workable. What isn’t workable is proceeding as if your answer is yes when it isn’t. That’s what creates the frustration six months from now when nothing has moved.
You don’t owe your next chapter to your strongest skill if it’s also the one you hate doing.
To read the full piece — including the five worksheet questions that guide you through the Skills circle and the evidence-gathering prompt for mid-career women who consistently undercount their own experience — sign up for The Unscripted Career Newsletter.